Dear PT Cruiser,

I hate you. And I hate that people "trick" you out.

You disgust me.


Regards,
Everyone

Don't worry folks, Chrysler isn't going anywhere. It's just reorganizing itself. But let's just hope they reorganize the ugly PT Cruiser out of its factories.

Still worried? Here's a primer by the New York Times regarding the Chrysler bankruptcy.

UPDATE: As stated in the comments below, what glorious news! It's like VPTC* Day! According to Bloomberg back in January, PT Cruiser production will end this summer!

* Victory over PT Cruisers

Dear Personalized License Plate,

How can can I take you or the driver of your motor vehicle with any degree of seriousness?

We get it. You have a grandson who loves you. You survived cancer. You have a God-fearing family. You love the [insert sports team here]. You really like Styx. You're a dentist/lawyer/cowboy/pimp.

You are aware that the cost of your license plate is included in your registration fees, right? I'm sure you are aware that you don't have to pay extra for a nice license plate number like: 4QTN917

But, yet, here you are purchasing a personalized license plate. Why? It's almost as worthless as putting a spoiler on a Toyota Corolla.

H8T 2 W8? I'd hate to wait any longer before I take a sledgehammer to your license plate.

And MOLTARR? I'd like to tar and feather this vanity plate.

Personalized plates don't impress anyone. Please remove and throw away into hobo fireplaces.



Regards,
Everyone

Knowledge:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moltar






Ed. Note: We get it. You were drunk and feeling self-righteous when you bought that hybrid vehicle. Or you were drunk when you got that personalized plate. Either way, you're a drunk.

Photo submitted by TCFS


Ed. Note: 'Won Big' then. Lost dignity now.

Photo submitted by TCFS


Click below to see even MORE shitty personalized license plates and submit your pictures to me at regardseveryone at gmail dot com

Personalized License Plate

N.B. Photos taken with my Canon PowerShot SD1100IS unless indicated otherwise.

Dear Prius Drivers,

Some people are aggressive drivers. Some people are cautious drivers. Some people are safe drivers. Some people are respectful drivers. But I have never seen someone drive in a self-righteous way until I saw you, Prius Driver.

We get it. You spent the extra money to buy this fuel-efficient - but costly - motor vehicle. After all, if you don't, who will?

So, you drive with this smug self-righteousness:

1. You drive the speed limit. Exactly the speed limit. Not a mph faster, not a mph slower.


2. You leave at least 4 car-lengths between your Precious Prius and the car in front of you.


3. You don't run through yellow lights.


4. You make full and complete stops.


5. You park on the side of Wilshire during the time you're not supposed to park and just casually flip on your hazard lights thus ensuring people see your self-righteousness. As if to say, "Look at me. I'm driving a Prius and holding up goddamn traffic."


6. You have some sort of nut-case liberal sticker on the back that make normal Democrats cringe and make Republicans want to stockpile more guns.


7. You have this smug look on your face at the gas station when you visit the pump for the first time this month.


8. You have the right of way. Every way. Every time.


9. UPDATE: You get in a fender-bender with another car and you step out of the car and yell at the other driver: "I HAVE NEVER BEEN IN A GODDAMN ACCIDENT IN MY ENTIRE LIFE! EVER." Woah there, Prius Driver, we get it. You are a perfect driver. You can do no wrong.


10. UPDATE (5 August 2009): You creep all the way into a busy intersection trying to make a left turn without any regard for the oncoming traffic speeding at you at 40mph. But you have to make the left turn. You deserve to make people slam on their brakes so you can make that turn. Asshole.

The list goes on and on.

We get it, Prius Driver. You're single-handedly saving the world.

Screw you.



Regards,
Everyone

Tell me about your experiences with a smug, self-righteous Prius Driver!

Dear NASCAR,

You look pretty awesome in High Definition. I can't imagine watching NASCAR any other way from here on out.

Yes, we secretly like watching you too.


Regards,
Everyone

Kyle Busch won the race in Las Vegas earlier today:

Dear Cruise Control,

To illustrate how much I love you, here is a list of the Top 3 inventions of the past 100 years:

3. Sliced Bread
2. Electricity
1. Cruise Control on my '99 Toyota Camry




Here is also a short list of the Top 3 places I use you:

3. San Vicente between Bundy and Ocean Ave.
2. Late-night drive down the 10 freeway between the 110 and PCH.
1. EVERYWHERE I CAN.

Apparently there is a cruise control feature on passenger vehicles with manual transmission too. This might combine my two most favorite things in motor vehicle engineering.

Life should be more like manual transmission and cruise control.


Regards,
Everyone

N.B. Photo taken with my Canon PowerShot SD1100IS.

Dear Pedestrian,

Don't make me turn this into a hit-and-run.


Regards,
Everyone


I'm halfway into turning into a parking lot with ample time before the oncoming traffic gets to me. But here comes this pedestrian leisurely strolling up the sidewalk.

Can't you see me? Can't you see the oncoming traffic? Can't you see that I'm trying to get into this parking lot?

My car weighs about 15 times more than you.

Get. Out. Of. My. Fucking. Way.