Dear Vampire Bats,

Dude. Can you guys stop being so creepy?


We thought you jerks flew around and chased people around and got in their hair. But here you are crawling around and being more menacing and disgusting. You creep us out more than a mustached child-molester in a molester van.

Whatever happened to the whole flying thing? Did you eliminate it to maximize your creepiness?

And lets be honest here, your name doesn't really help either.

Take one of the most feared supernatural beings of all time, the Vampire, and take one of the most disgusting creatures of all time, the Bat, and we get you: Vampire Bat.

We know what you're thinking, Vampire Bat. You think that Twilight did a pretty good public service for you.

You got much of the teenage world thinking that some vampires can be nice and these teenage kids girls are now thinking they can cruise right up to you and say, "What's up? Can you be my Edward Cullen?"

It's a pretty good scam but we know that the first chance you get, you'll bite 'em, suck out all their blood and leave them for dead in a ditch.


Listen, all we know is that one of the toughest guys we know is Bruce Wayne and he had to pretend to be a bat to conquer his fear of bats. That's why it's okay if we are scared of you and that's why it's okay we hate your little bat guts.

So, Vampire Bats? Stick with flying, stay away from me and go to hell.


Regards,
Everyone

Watch some more awesome videos of bats captured in super-slow motion (I'm sure there's a technical term for "super-slow motion") and be amazed:
http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/loom/2009/03/19/how-to-be-a-bat-life-in-motion/

Dear Heath Ledger,

If you don't win the Oscar, the Academy have no souls.

And this is Hollywood, right? Let's be honest here, you winning the Oscar is good television.

Rest In Peace, buddy.


Regards,
Everyone

Dear Christian Bale,

You're the best.

Regards,
Everyone


I love Christian Bale and not just for The Prestige, Newsies and Empire of the Sun.

This is why: http://www.aolcdn.com/tmz_audio/020209_christianbale.mp3

And here's the amazing remix:


Amazing, right?

Two things I wish Christian Bale would've said:
"WHY???" (in the Batman voice) and "You'll never work in this town again."

Some people think this guy is nuts ... but think about it. This is a guy who quite literally portrayed an American Psycho. This is a guy who dropped, like, a thousand pounds for The Machinst and then gained that back and then some so he could revive the Batman franchise. It would be an understatement to say that Bale is pretty into his roles.

Meanwhile, that poor ol' director of photography has done stuff like Mr. 3000, Semi-Pro, Crazy/Beautiful, Drumline. What was he going to say to Christian Bale? "Hey, shut the fuck up, I shot Semi-Pro?"

According to Wikipedia:

Assistant director and producer of Terminator: Salvation Bruce Franklin said it was an isolated incident.

"If you are working in a very intense scene and someone takes you out of your groove...It was the most emotional scene in the movie," said Franklin. "And for him to get stopped in the middle of it. He is very intensely involved in his character. He didn't walk around like that all day long. It was just a moment and it passed."

CHRISTIAN. BALE. IS. INTENSE.

And that's why he rules.