18 March 2009

Dear AIG,

You want to hand out $165 million in bonuses. That's a bit of a slap in the face, isn't it? Thankfully you've asked some execs to return some of the bonuses. You guys are still assholes, though.

Now, the bonuses are the sexy story. It's a manageable dollar figure (in my head) that is being handed out to tangible entities: People.

But the REAL problem is the $170 billion that we gave you and that you should be paying back ASAP.

ONE-HUNDRED SEVENTY BILLION DOLLARS. That doesn't even make sense in my head. That's like a ridiculous number Dr. Evil would spit out!

Do you see what they did there, AIG? It was funny back then 'cause it's a ridiculous number. Today $100+ billion dollars is a cold, stark reality. No one is laughing anymore. Well, that clip is still funny. So we're chuckling. Wryly.

Oh and don't let me forget to remind you about your sponsorships as well. One of the most visible being Manchester United.

Anyway. AIG? You guys are assholes. I'm sure we'll talk again later.


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