14 April 2009

Dear Internal Revenue Service,

Listen, we get it. We gotta pay up and you gotta enforce payment.

But your scare tactics aren't going to phase me.

Look at your logo:

Let's just say it sorta reminds us of another logo:

C'mon IRS, you think your Gestapo tactics are going to freak us out and get us to pay our taxes earlier?

We know you've been strong-arming organizations such as TurboTax to start sending us threatening e-mails to remind me about the deadline (15 April). Using lies like "Get your refund earlier!" or "Deadline coming soon!" and even threats like "Time is running out!"

The nerve.

Forget about it. You don't scare us. We're going right up to the wire.

We're digging out our carelessly placed W-2s on the 14th. We're dusting off that box of receipts and making deduction-piles on the floor. We're calling up our Shady Tax Guy to make up some deductions ("Of course I donated $500.00 to that charity!"). We're going to find that Post Office that's open until midnight. We're going to roll the dice and not mail our taxes with Certified Mail.

We're doing this because you don't scare us IRS. And this is goddamn America. Not Naziland.

This is the American way to do taxes.

U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!



  1. Haha i was just talking about this! Here's a joke: What do you call a tax nazi? a taxi!

    it makes no sense.

    i know.

  2. I'm annoyed that in 2009, I have a tax preparer who doesn't file electronically. Only old-fashioned and paranoid people should send paper copies via U.S. mail.

    I mailed my federal return weeks ago and got my refund. Just today I sent my state return in, along with a check roughly equal to that federal refund. Boo. And no, I did not use certified mail.

    Oh and that nazi stuff is a little over the top. I'm just sayin'.